Happy Thanksgiving to Me!

Hercules, Xena, and a turkey walk into a bar.



You would think that one of them would have seen it.

Let's talk about money

Hey guys, I want everything on this site for Christmas. It's like it's my 2009th Birthday!

Actually, I was just kidding. I'd like none of this, I think I would be incredibly disappointed if I went to open the gift you got for me and saw this. You know the expression about jokes, "if you have to explain it, you don't get it." That's how I feel about the caption they put on this framed Marvel stock certificate:

I guess it's not all bad. Val bought her friend Vicki stock in Coca-Cola. She went to Columbia for the shareholder meeting and never came back! Great present!!

Isaac Asimov

Isaac Asimov is a renowned Science Fiction author and biochemist. He was reared in the same area of Brooklyn I currently live in and enjoyed small spaces--like me! (Claustrophilia, look it up) This was originally going to be about how the fact that all his stories are about Three Laws of Robotics*, there are a finite number of stories dealing with the permutations of these laws. But I think I'd rather just read.

My favorite short story is "Think!"



* Three Laws of Robotics by Isaac Asimov:
1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey any orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

This is Exactly What I'm Thinking

There's a specific routine I do every time I leave my house for work in the morning. Check for keys, check for debit card, lock the door behind me. I usually go on my bike and think: Is today the day I get to witness a massive terrorist attack? I ride my bike through Park Slope and don't run lights because there are lots of strollers, and then I zone out until I have to go up Smith Street to the Manhattan bridge. I curse at cars and bad roads and people who don't watch where they are going. I'll whistle so it doesn't get to me. I get to take my helmet off when I go across the Manhattan Bridge and let the sweat in my hair dry off so I'm not so stinky when I get to work. Chinatown sucks: everyone stands in the streets and stares at me without saying "hi" or smiling. At all. I go up First Avenue and note when I cross 14th, 23rd, 30th, and 40th. Then I park my bike outside, lock both wheels and the seat so they're all there when I get back (maybe) and I go sweatily inside. I take a sink bath on the 22nd floor and change into work clothes until 7:00 pm, when I put on my cut-offs and sneakers on in the office. Check for keys, check for helmet, and turn off the lights behind me.

Oh jeez!

I finished classes, have a job I like, ride my bike, and love my boyfriend.
I'm blog-boring.

I also crochet ugly things and bought a computer today.

I am really upset!

I started collecting the state quarters last year and after several months, had them all. (Gotta catchem all!) It was cathartic when I got Hawaii as change from Tak King and a text message from Alex that said, "guess what I have in my pocket?" It was a Maine quarter. The 50th.

That was it! I put them in a roll and lazily started another collection, but didn't really look for quarters like I used to.

However! Today at the post office, I was waiting in line and fumbling in my pocket. I found THIS:



LOL US MINT!! YOU'RE ADDING MORE!?!?!?

Be on the lookout in 2009 for:
- The Commonwealth of Puerto Rico
- Guam
- American Samoa
- The U.S. Virgin Islands
- The Northern Mariana Islands

I know I will.

No, no thanks.

If you put shrunken eggs in your toothspaces, you will have whiter teef. Thanks for the tip, mom!

I've been watching you all week

I'm trying to distract myself from recent horrible news. The economy. Sri Lanka cricket players in Pakistan. Designer babies. Michael Jackson is going to make a special announcement today! Everything is so fucked up!

But! I'm going to Arizona in a week for a week where it's bathing suit weather.

(I saw this video first on videogum.com)